what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
