I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I think your dad took our porno
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
