Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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