my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
