It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
she told me i tasted like america
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
