Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
