I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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