no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Blow job season was short but glorious.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I just gargled with NyQuil
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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