"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
