you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
