i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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