What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
We have started to decorate penises.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
