I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
