Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
