thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
