and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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