I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Boobs speak an international language.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
