she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
