i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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