i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
