My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
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