i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
