woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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