Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Every concussion has its silver lining
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
