She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
