just tell him i said nine months
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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