I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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