Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Randomize
