I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
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