I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
