When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
