Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
