Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
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