its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
