and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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