I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize