the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
i am craving dick and cupcakes
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
