forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
When are your genitals available?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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