I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
