we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
