that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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