the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
