Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
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