Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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