Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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