I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
she looked like the before picture.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
