Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
