glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
