His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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