He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We left the knife in your bed.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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